Don't Ask Don't Tell, Don't Pursue: A Gay Woman Marine Who Didn't Tell For Years Now Speaks Out

by Julianne Sohn

I‘ve always wanted to serve my country. 

And when I decided to apply to Marine Corps Officer Candidates School (OCS), I was determined to become a leader of Marines.  But there was one small detail.  Okay, it wasn’t really that small.  It was and still is the Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell Policy. 
 
During my senior year at UCLA, I wanted to serve so much that I felt that I could adhere to the policy and be a hard-charging Marine.  Little did I know how hard it would be on myself and my loved ones.
 
I was commissioned as a 2nd lieutenant in the Marines in December of 1999.  After 10 weeks of surviving OCS, I was a Marine.  I went on to serve on active duty until 2003 as a public affairs officer.  And later I served a tour of duty in Iraq in 2005.  It was definitely an honor to serve my country, but over time I realized that I should have asked myself another question, “at what cost?”
 
WOMEN STAND OUT
 
According to a Servicemembers Legal Defense Network (SLDN) report last year, in 2006 and 2007, women account for about 15 percent of the overall military--but women made up of about 46 to 47 percent of the Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell discharges. 
 
The numbers are shocking, especially to my counterparts in law enforcement where many gay women on the job are open and out.  But in the military and especially the Marine Corps, homophobia and sexism play a key role in this statistic.  In fact, this perception comes from the very jokes Marines share.
 
For example, Women Marines are one of three things, dykes, bitches or hos. That’s the type of environment you live in. The Marine Corps has the lowest percentage of women—just 6% whereas, the Air Force has 20%.
 
In the early 1980s, throughout the military, gay servicemen and women were being forced out in what were called the “witch hunts.”  In Parris Island, SC, where Marines train female recruits, the then Naval Investigative Service (NIS) began the witch hunts there.  Agents would sit in the parking lots of gay bars and tried to track down possible lesbian Marines.  The efforts of NIS targeted highly skilled and motivated female drill instructors, series commanders and women Marines working at boot camp. 
 
When the witch hunts were over, approximately 23 women were discharged for being gay officially.  However, there were hundreds of women forced to resign their commission or leave due to the pressure of these prosecutions.  In fact, one female enlisted Marine was charged, court-martialed and eventually jailed for allegedly violating the Uniform Code of Military Justice (UCMJ) because of “conduct unbecoming.”
 
I received orders to go to Parris Island in 2001 right after Sept 11th.  This was about 20 years after these witch hunts.  And I would have Marines warn me about 4th Battalion, which is the all-female recruit training battalion.  The jokes were still there 20 years after the witch hunts and I was going to be stationed there.  I knew I had to be extremely careful not to “skyline” myself.  (“Skyline” is a term used in the military that means, the enemy can see you silhouetted on the horizon and that is a very bad thing although it looks cool on movie posters.)

As I drove onto base for the first time, a young Marine at the guard shack saluted me and then said, “Ma’am, weren’t you stationed at Okinawa with the 3rd Marine Division.”  I stared at him and tried to rack my brain…where did I know him from?  Then he said that he remembered me from when I was doing some administrative errands there. 

It was at that moment when I realized that despite being all of 5 feet tall.  I couldn’t really hide.  There aren’t that many females and I was already “sky-lined.”

GETTING AROUND DADT

The one thing about this discriminatory policy is that is selectively enforced.  Some officers turn a blind eye toward it and others don’t.  For me, I was very cautious about who I was out to.  I always had to “feel” out someone’s political leanings and ideology before coming out.  But there was one time…when I was almost asked by someone, who I considered a friend.
 
I was sitting in my office at the 6th Marine Corps District, enjoying my morning when my friend, who was the adjutant and legal officer of the unit came in.  He walked in, said “hi” and asked if he could close the door.  My first thought was “Oh no, either one of my Marines is in trouble or I’m in trouble.”  I welcomed him in and he sat down.
 
I asked him what was going on and if anyone was in trouble.  He said, “No one is in trouble, but I’ve been hearing some rumors and I wanted to help you.  Now I can’t legal ask you and you can’t legally…”  I stopped him and said, I know what you are getting at and you’re half right.  (At the time, I considered myself bisexual.)  And he went out to say that as a friend he wanted to shut down the rumors in order to protect me.  And he did.  He and another close friend of mine made sure that the rumor mill was shut down. 
 
This caused a great deal of stress.  I was afraid of that phone call.  Or my colonel saying, “hey, lieutenant, come see me in my office.”  I didn’t want to be called on the carpet because of DADT.  I just wanted to serve and be a Marine. 

Eventually, I decided that due to the stress of living under DADT that I should leave active duty.  This is despite the fact that I loved being a Marine and serving with Marines.  It was in 2005 when I was called up from the reserves to serve with the 5th Civil Affairs Group, which was headquartered in Fallujah and later Ramadi.
 
At the time, I had a partner and she lived with me in New York City.  A lot of my friends were not sure why I would willing go back into the military given the fact that I had to be a second class citizen to serve.  I had to go back into the closet.  But I wanted to serve my country and work with Marines again. 
 
Now most people can call home and tell someone they love them but if you’re gay in the military, you can’t.  And I had to make special arrangements to ensure that she was notified if anything went wrong.  She had no support network besides my siblings and when we wrote to each other we never mentioned “love” just “take care.” 

On June of 2005, the worst attack on female servicemembers happened in Fallujah.  The initial news reports stated the civil affairs unit—where I worked—was attacked.  My whole family went crazy, including my partner at the time.  Despite the fact that we had been dating for three years, I couldn’t name her as next of kin, without violating DADT.  
 
Before I left for Iraq, I named my brother as next of kin and told him, every time I contact you, you have to contact her.  My three brothers were very good about making sure everyone was in the loop.

CALL TO DUTY – FIGHTING FOR EVERYONE'S RIGHTS
 
In spring of 2006, I joined the Call to Duty Tour, which was a national tour meant to reignite the debate on DADT. 
 
It took me a while to decide to join because speaking out, even though I was in the Individual Ready Reserve (IRR), put me at risk.  But I realized how important it was to share my story because it is clearly discrimination and unjust.  Gay servicemembers put their lives on the line to protect everyone’s right for equal protection under the law and yet, there I was not being protected by the very Constitution that I swore to protect and defend.
 
I did it to expose the policy for being what it is--inherently discriminatory.  
 
My work eventually got me that phone call.  The very one I dreaded while on active-duty.  In the fall of 2007, I was read my rights and told that I was under investigation for violating the DADT policy while in the IRR. 

In April of 2008, after a brief fight over the wording in my resignation letter, I received an honorable discharge from the Marines even though, I still wanted to serve.  I was being told that I could not.  Not because I was unable to or unqualified, but because I told my story about what it was like to serve without being able to be open about who I loved.   

TIME TO CHANGE

This policy will end because it is wrong.  But it is imperative that people – gay or straight – come together and fight to end this. 
 
The Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell policy is a law that was passed by Congress in 1993 and it must be repealed by Congress.  Currently, Congressman Patrick Murphy of Pennsylvania is the lead sponsor of the Military Readiness Enhancement Act and there are only 162 co-sponsors.  We need more.
 
The Human Rights Campaign and Servicemembers United (formerly known as the Call to Duty Tour) are sponsoring the Voices of Honor Tour, which will target key states and congressional districts to educate people on the impact of this policy. 
 
The Service Women’s Action Network (SWAN) is also helping this effort and it is critical that people contact their Congressional Representatives and say, “The DADT policy doesn’t work.” 
 
This policy forces out Arabic linguists such as Dan Choi and  forces out people who want to serve this country at a great cost both financially and figuratively.  And it highlights how far behind we are compared to our allies (over 25 of our allied nations allow gays to serve openly including Israel, Australia and the UK). 
 
Ultimately, our military should be a reflection of our nation and our very Constitution where all men and women are created equal.  

http://www.govtrack.us/congress/bill.xpd?bill=h111-1283 -- to see co-sponsors are on the Military Readiness Enhancement Act

http://www.hrc.org/sites/voicesofhonor/index.asp
  

Julianne Sohn served for five years as a public affairs officer in the U.S. Marine Corps and Marine Reserve. She graduated from the University of California at Los Angeles with a degree in anthropology and political science and was commissioned as a second lieutenant after completing Officer Candidate School in December 1999. She then graduated from the basic officer course in June 2000.

Sohn’s active-duty assignments include serving with the consolidated Public Affairs Office of the III Marine Expeditionary Force in Okinawa, Japan, from 2000 to 2001. During her tour there, she deployed to Korea, Thailand and mainland Japan to support joint, combined military exercises such as Cobra Gold, Ulchi Focus Lens and an artillery relocation exercise. She also served as the public affairs officer for the 6th Marine Corps Recruiting District, headquartered in Parris Island, S.C., from 2001 to 2003. Sohn left the Marine Corps in 2003 due to the strain of serving under the "Don’t Don’t Tell" policy.

In 2005, Sohn was activated from the Individual Ready Reserve and served with the 5th Civil Affairs Group in Fallujah, Iraq, and then later in Ramadi. During her tour in Iraq, Sohn worked with civil affairs teams that operated in al-Anbar province to generate media coverage for infrastructure projects, earning a Navy Marine Corps Achievement Medal.

Sohn is a member of the Society of Professional Journalists and the American Legion and is a graduate of the Columbia University Graduate School of Journalism. She was the honor graduate for her class from the Los Angeles Police Academy in February 2006 and currently serves as a police officer in LAPD's Use of Force Review Division. She is also an on-call public information officer for the LAPD.